I don't think I will ever understand why I insist on being so neurotic about some things.

Relationships come and go... so does my brain. At the worst possible times.

The heart wasn't created to think, but it sure does a good job of fooling me into believing it can.

If I always followed my gut instinct, I would have committed suicide long ago.

It's a great day when you realize that your real friends are the ones who've known you since you were 5, move away to school, don't talk to you for a year and a half, and then offer to pay you to be at their wedding. (I guess I should qualify that by inserting "the photographer" between "be" and "at")

If you stay awake long enough, and think about it too hard, the entire concept of sleep becomes rather amusing. In a bad way.

Some women love chocolate. Some women love shoes. I love shoes.

I don't think cell phone usage causes cancer. I think that thinking you're not going to get cancer causes cancer.

Bonus discovery of the day: My earring holes have not grown shut in 4 months of neglect.

EZ-pass = good.

Looking for semi-valuable belongings that could possibly be sold on Ebay or Amazon Marketplace for rent money = bad.

Sleep = good.

Waking up, rolling over, and remembering that I am alone in my pillowtop queen-size bed = bad.

I'm getting a perm tomorrow (today). My hair will once again be full of body and bounce. Maybe my hair will fall out in fist-fulls now, instead of just 30 or 40 strands a day in the shower.

I like Pier 1.

It makes me happy when people remember my birthday.

I shudder to think what the world will have become in another 60 years. (Lord of the Rings scares the crap out of me... but I know the world's not going to be like that for another 1031 years)

I miss the good old days, and I'm only 20 years old.

All good things must come to an end... that must be why Survivor is still on the air.

I prefer more General Mills cereals than Kellogg's or Post.

Nothing beats my daddy's homemade chocolate chip cookies. Except cookie slop. Damn that stuff is delicious. What is cookie slop you ask? Why it's simply no-bake oatmeal cookie goo... without the cookie shape. You just leave it right in the bowl. It looks like puke, but it's sweeter than sweetness itself.

I'm frantically searching my apartment for anything that I can return or sell to get a little money... No, it's not to buy drugs. It's to buy film. Damn RIT.

Pick-up lines for the stupid and tactless?

"You must have horrible, painful blisters on your heels. Because you've been running through my dreams all night. In uncomfortable shoes."

"I must've died, changed religions, and spent 127 years in purgatory because I see an angel standing in front of me."

"You're so fine, I bet you'd slip through a colander."

"If I had to choose between being with you for one night and winning the lottery…I'd take the lottery. But it'd be close. Real close."

"You remind me of my fear of snakes."

"Once I knew two people who didn't fall in love. They both died horribly the following day. Makes you think."

"Your father must have been a thief, because I saw him stealing candy from a K-Mart."

Jordan

I did not know that John Cusack dated Neve Campbell for FOUR YEARS. Wow.